new year. new post.

my last entry was back in march of last year ..and i can really say
ive gone through so much.

i travelled to the other side of the world and experienced something
i cant put into words. every moment of it is still a dream to me. my mind
still lives in it.
i came across obstacles that i particularly dont regret but can erase.
and i experienced something that puts all the previous blog posts i wrote about
in the past to worthless. nothing back then didnt matter.

once u get a taste of something so real, u want it even more.
u hope for it even more and dream of every second of it.
i learned that as much as u want it, sometimes u cant always
have it forever :( things arent always meant to be the way u want.
but can only pray for 10x better.
i miss everything about it.

im scared of time.
i realize how fast im growing. how much older my parents are.
the things ive already been through.
it scares me. every bit of it.
time is my nightmare.
i long for the past and my future.

but i been happy.
im focusing on me. i love everything about myself.
i feel stronger. in control of my mind, my body, my spirit.
God is good to me.